Wednesday, March 11, 2015

when even sweatpants hurt. *bumpdate*

 Woke up this morning and thought, "geeze.  I look like a cow."
 I'm wearing my fuzziest and most comfy pj pants EVER here, and even they were killing me this morning!!  Waistbands are really bothering me this week.   I kept pushing the waistband down lower and lower, finally I was like good grief it's probably more comfortable to just go naked all day.  

HOWEVER birthday suits are not appreciated at walmart or the gymn so I decided against the idea. 
And instead bought my first pair of legit maternity shorts.  
As soon as I tried them on I was on cloud 9.....seriously, they are so comfy!!  My tummy felt awesome in them :-)

I was feeling so lazy today, and after getting back from some morning errands, I was pooped and ready to just lay around.  But I got in my "parent mode" and made myself put on my tennies and head out to the gym.  Felt so much better afterwards.  I'm always glad I did it - after the workout.  :-)

This week I have been absolutely STARVING.  I mean ravenously hungry.  Every 2 hours. (At least). far I've gained 3-4 pounds!  Kinda scary, but I know it means my baby is actually growing.  Woo hoo! 

This stuff has been my special treat this week.  Mmmmmm.  It tastes SO much better than it looks and it's so good for you.  One of my little ways to get greens in! (Cause I'd probably never eat kale plain anyways....)

Tuesday, March 10, 2015

How Can I NOT Be Grateful?

I was reading through the first few chapters of Jeremiah this morning.....and as I read, I felt like kind of "re-wording" what I was reading.  Sometimes I feel like it's helpful to paraphrase what I'm reading in my own words; it sorta makes it hit home a little more.  Makes it more personal.  God, speaking to ME....not just the world as a whole. 

So in chapter 2, vs. 1-11, this is what I re-worded:

"I remember you.

I remember how much you loved Me when you were young; how you followed after Me when you didn’t have anything or anyone else.  You were sacred to Me - and I jealously protected you from those who would destroy you.

But now, you’ve moved on.  Moved on to “more important things”.  What have I done wrong, that you would stray so far from Me?  You’ve forgotten everything I did for you.  You don’t ask where I am anymore; You don’t look for me.

I have been so good to you; I gave you only My blessings in full abundance. Grace after grace!  But as soon as you received it, you turned against me.  You’ve taken it all for granted. 

You read My Word, but you don’t know Me; you aren’t truly seeking Me.  You’ve found others who have become your Everything.

I’m telling you plainly - you are guilty.  Have you ever heard of a person turning their back on someone who saved their life?  Never!  But that’s exactly what you have done - you exchanged Me, your Everything, for nothing.

Throughout Jeremiah, there seems to be a resounding theme: God blesses His children in crazy ways, but it's never quite enough for them.  They get what they want and then promptly turn away to other gods.

Sound familiar?  Did for me.

I've only been alive for 21 years but....I've been blessed by a magnificent God in some amazing ways.

Saved by grace, completely undeserved.
Born in America.
Born into a Christian home.
Parents that love each other deeply.
Dedicated mom who gave 23 years and counting to raising and homeschooling each of us kids.
Attentive dad who let me know that I mattered.
Tons of super fun sibling memories growing up.
A courtship that I never expected would happen.
An wonderful husband who loves the Lord.
A beautiful home.
A precious little life inside me.
The chance to be a nurse.
A husband who works crazy hours to provide for me.

And that's just a super short summary of how I'm blessed.
I've been given the world - God has done so much for me!  How can I be anything BUT grateful? How can I not give my life in full surrender to a Savior who loves me more than I can ever imagine?

It's crazy how easy it is to forget my awesome Creator and just hop along on MY merry way and do MY THING and think that I'm somehow in control of my life.

"The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness."  - Jeremiah 31:3

Let's not forget how good God is!  He is so generous and loving.  He is God.
It's a call to be humbled before His throne and grateful at His feet.

Saturday, March 7, 2015

Where Home Is

 So I've been asked many times by several different people to post pictures of our apartment!  FINALLY I am doing it. :-)  Most of these pictures were taken on different days, as different parts of the house happened to be cleaned haha - so that accounts for the variance in lighting!!

 This is our room.   I love having a comforter on our bed - it's one of those little things that just makes me happy (as opposed to a quilt).    I think it was raining the day I took this picture - that's why the window looks all spotty lol.

 I took this picture at Christmas time when we had our tree up :-) That's gone now of course, but I always have the white lights on top of the kitchen cabinets.  I love the coziness of them in the evening and early mornings!! 

 The top of our bookshelf - I finally got around to ordering prints of our wedding photos, so this one's on display.  Sorry it's kinda blurry here.

 Our bathroom.  You might have noticed by now that these aren't very spacious shots; our apartment is small and cozy so these are more like places rather than different rooms :-)  Though our bedroom is seperate from the living room.

 And this - is our "linen closet"!!!  It's actually quite handy having this big ole' basket with fresh towels in it right next to the sink / shower.  Easy access.  Plus it forces me to actually fold them up and organize them. :-)

 Quick caveat here, just had to say that I am LOVING these soy candles from Target right now.  This lavender one I keep in our room - since lavender is supposed to "enhance sleep" I usually light it in the evening when we're both getting ready for bed.  It's so relaxing and yummy smelling :-) David knows me so well now that if I'm in the shower, he'll go ahead and light all my candles for me throughout the house to make it smell good. 

The kitchen and living room are sort of combined - it's nice and open-feeling. 

We have a big window in the living room that our kitchen table is right in front of.  I got this Scripture decal from Hobby Lobby and put it above our window - I love it!  It's the perfect touch. 

This week I've really started noticing some baby movements!!  Sooo exciting to feel finally!!  It's mainly at night when I lie down and am totally still, I start to feel my little pumpkin swimming around in there lol :-) Sometimes it's really pronounce and I feel all this pressure on one side or the other, and then when I feel with me hand at that spot, there's this big hard lump there.  It's so crazy!  It feels so amazing to know that I have the privilege of being this baby's home for 9 months.  Pregnancy is truly a miracle.

Thursday, March 5, 2015

This 'n That

Today David had the day off of work, which was really nice because I had no school so we FINALLY got a day off together.  (Often it seems his days off and mine never seem to coincide so it's frustrating.)  We spent the day just chill-axin! He made me breakfast and then washed almost all the dishes for me!  Lest you think I was being lazy.....I spent my morning folding laundry and pondering the disgusting-ness of tomato soup dried on the carpet.  Now I know why mom never let us eat in the living room.  :-/  Then we went to walmart and did some romantic grocery shopping and then came home, made dinner (Quinoa, veggies, and chicken) which we ate while watching episodes of Psych

A gorgeous sunrise a few mornings ago! 
One thing I've been noticing recently is how bad I end up feeling when I eat junk food.  I've been eating so well since we got married that now, splurging on bad stuff just makes me feel gross.  I was so called "craving" peanut m&m's the other day and, against better judgement, bought myself the "tear-and-share" size at the store.  Just about did me in - and they really weren't even all the great.  Last weekend we spent with David's parents, and I ended up eating pizza, cookies, potato chips, ice cream, etc....ugh!  Monday morning when we got back home I was pretty grateful to be back at my granola and fruit for breakfast!

Speaking of being healthy, I am SUPER wanting to get Maria Kang's new book, the No More Excuses Diet!  She has been such an inspiration to me and makes me want to take care of myself better and better.   There are so many fad-diets out there (including Trim Healthy Mama lol!!), so I love how Maria Kang actually focuses not on dieting but on eating real food, and doing real workouts.  Especially now that I'm a mommy - I want to eat right and workout right so I can take care of my baby!  My foot has been killing me still (have no idea what's up with that) but I can still run so I've been trying to keep doing that as I'm able to.  Felt so proud of myself tonight - 2.65 miles, 220 cals burned in 30 minutes!  Although I still don't particularly care for excercising, I'm finding I really have a passion for being healthy.  Including excercise.

Speaking of food, I'm definitely hungrier these days - it seems that just about every 2 hours I'm needing a snack.  Kashi granola bars, ANY kind of cold fruit, veggies and hummus, or nuts/craisins/chocolate chips, or smoothies are pretty much my go-to for snacks.  Oh yeah - and honey-nut cheerios are my absolute downfall with a passion.  So so yummy (especially right before bed!).

 Did anyone get out to see The Drop Box? We really really wanted to see it but it ended up only showing late in the evening, and we get up so early it just wouldn't have worked.   But I'm really interested in seeing it.

Of course, right after I talk about me being "passionate" about being healthy I show THIS picture.  Uh huh.  lol Valentine's Day, David took me out to a bakery that's super close to our house and we got some yummies :-)  However I will say that we biked there, to justify the gazillion calories we consumed there.  It was a nice treat :-)  

Although I am relieved to be on spring break, I am staring at 2 whole beautifully empty weeks, wondering what on earth I'm going to do with myself lol.  Gosh!  It's nice not to have school but.....hmmmm.   Any ideas??

Wednesday, March 4, 2015

Bumpdate - 16 weeks 5 days

(Can you tell how exited I am??  I have 2 WHOLE WEEKS off!!!!! So awesome.)

Today was my last OB clinical day.  I officially passed the first 1/2 of my second semester!  This semester, school was divided into 2 parts.  The first half was OB/Peds, and the second half is MedSurg.   You had to pass the first section to progress to the next.  Praise God, I did it!  Yesterday was OB/Peds finals; a Hessi exam and a Kaplan exam.  Even though I always feel unprepared for finals, I did alot better than I had anticipated.  Now it's just a matter of finishing the second half.  I'm not too worried except for the dreaded MedMath exam the first day back at school.  It's a pass or fail thing, have to get a 90%, and if you don't, they have no problem kicking you out.  It's serious business!  I sweat bullets over math tests for that reason.  :-/

Our beautiful baby (OUR baby - I love saying that) is 16 weeks and 5 days!  Time marches on - can't believe I'm approaching 17 weeks.  Although I'm not really showing much yet, I feel like I just look thick.  My jeans, though they still fit, are starting to hurt.  Basically I feel like I have a football in my stomach and it's sore - so I don't like having anything tight around my waist!!  It's so weird, bending over just isn't comfortable as it used to be and I can't lay on my stomach anymore.  I don't even like having my seat belt on.  LEAVE MY STOMACH ALONE! lol

My wonderful husband is doing great.  He works so hard at his job, I'm so proud of him.  Even though I do miss my family sometimes, I am so happy being Mrs. Camarena :-)  He treats me like a princess!  Honestly, there's not a day where I don't wake up rolling over in bed and thinking "How on earth did I end up getting such a fantastic husband!"  I don't deserve this incredible guy.  God sure does answer prayers :-)

"But you, Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness!"
-Psalm 86:15

One thing I've been convicted of recently much I don't know about God.  I love Jesus but.....honestly what I know about Him is so small in comparison to His greatness.  Sometimes I just feel like everything there is to know about God is like an ocean, and I only have a soda-can full!  

I've been reading Knowing God by J.I. Packer.  And these chapters are deep.  I almost can't get through one in one sitting - there's so much to take in.  I've also been trying to be more consistent in having my morning devotions, regardless of how much studying I have to do.  It's crazy, on test days I feel like I should just wake up and start studying but I've started opening up God's Word first before my nursing textbooks.  And crazily enough....I have gotten the best and highest grades yet since starting last semester.  (for me.)   Quotes like this motivate me to pursue God with a new a fiery passion:

“Disregard the study of God, and you sentence yourself to stumble and blunder through life blindfolded, as it were, with no sense of direction and no understanding of what surrounds you. This way you can waste your life and lose your soul.”

I'm constantly reminded that anything and everything I do should be for God's glory.  And anything that isn't?  Is pretty much a waste of time. I want my priorities in line.  I want to focus on and invest in the things that really matter in life.  Jesus, my husband, and my kids.   I don't want to get to the end of my  life and realize that I kept putting those three things on the back burner in exchange for the "urgent" stuff.  

I love this journey God has me on!  It's scary sometimes - (especially this nursing school thing) - but I just have to keep trusting that He knows what He's doing and that He will get me through. It's comforting to know that anything He allows into my life is for a reason and for my good.  We sure have a great God!

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Married Life - Today's Reality

 It's 6:30 pm.  Tuesday night.  We're sitting on the couch, me trying to earn swagbucks and him playing Hill Climb Racer on his phone.  


We wonder what's for dinner as neither of us have made anything.  David gets up to warm some stir fry noodles for his dinner while I contemplate the savory reality of having granola and strawberries instead. 

 I start this blog post while he looks up from the kitchen sink holding what's left our sink drain-catcher and asks, "Oh, did you break this too?"    I laugh and say yup!  I break everything around here.  Last week I set my curling hot curling iron too close to my plastic storage bin and managed to melt the entire side of it. 

All in all we are tired at the end of a day!!  When our class broke for lunch at 11am this morning I decided I was DONE for the day and NOT in the mood to stay for the rest of the lecture til 4pm.  So the day commenced in us making a totally aimless and impromptu drive to Bisbee just to see what there was, and after pulling off to look at what we thought was an abandoned church we were corralled by the owner who thought we were trespassers and then told it was ok to look around.  Then we went to a pizza place that we THOUGHT would be yummy but then quickly left when the menu didn't even have prices on it (totally out of our league).   We ended our trip at Walmart buying severely discounted granola bars and coming home to make pizza and do laundry.  

And just now my cute and delightful  husband tries to tempt me with his personal bag of (very unhealthy) dorritos.  Followed by the totally-guy question of, "Have you ever seen one of these things burned up?" He then proceeds to set it on fire over the sink.  

Heck, I married a firefighter, what can I expect?  
lol....just total randomness as we wrap up our day.

Why does it smell like burnt chips in here now?

Friday, February 20, 2015

15 Weeks Bumpdate

Hey there!  So....four weeks without posting a prego-update means I actually have something visible to show you on the bump-side of things.  Mainly I was taking a break because the last two weeks have been SO. CRAZY.  Between clinicals and simulation labs two weeks in a row, I'm bushed and brain-dead. 

(Of course, as I write this, I'm feeling guilty because I'm sitting amongst a yet-again messy living room with no plans for dinner and a pile of homework to do for the ginormous test awaiting me on Monday.)

But who cares!!  Honestly sometimes I think that the best way to get through nursing school is just not to care too much.  That sounds horribly lazy but....over analyzing things and over studying are deadly combinations for this girl.  So I just study as much as I have time for and leave the rest up to the Lord.  Do my assignments, don't get overly involved, and MOVE ON.

Speaking of moving on!!!  Looky looky!  Finally there's something there.  Of course I KNOW it's like.....nothing compared to a 36-weeker.....but I'm happy just to see anything :-)  And nope, I'm not sticking my stomach out and this is not after a meal.  

(Pardon the horrendous hair. )
Weight:  Hard to say.  I feel like I've been super hungry this last week. Like, voraciously starving. At this point in our marriage, David knows me so well that all I have to do is roll over at any given time in the night and be like....."Babe, I sure love you....." and he knows that's code word for I-need-a-bowl-of-cereal NOW.  He's such a good sport about my horridly-timed food whims!! lol  My man.....*sigh*

 This morning's weight was 121, but I'm doubting I actually gained 3 pounds since two days ago.  :-/ I have to admit I was scared when I saw that number on the scale....but I have to keep reminding myself that in the case of pregnancy, weight gain is good.  Since I'm now in the 2nd trimester and I haven't gained anything at all yet, I wouldn't be surprised if I'm starting now.  Healthy weight gain for a full pregnancy is 25 - 30 pounds.......(I shudder).....but I am really working on seeing this as normal and healthy (not to mention necessary) for baby.

Cravings / Aversions: Well I'm officially sick of avacados.  Bleh.  Too bad I just bought like six more last week that are now rotting on my kitchen counter.  As usual I love fresh fruits and veggies, anything sweet and crunchy and refreshing!  I find that I'm having CRAZY dreams (like 4 vivid ones per night) and usually at least one of those dreams involves food of some sort.  Then I wake up and am like.....mmm, peanut butter and jelly sounds SO good right now.....

For the record, I'm ashamed to say that last Sunday evening ended in a spur-of-the-moment binge on hot cheetos and a box of valentines assorted chocolates.  I am so bad.  (But man was it good. )

How I'm Feeling:  Except for this morning, I think I've finally gotten out of feeling queasy at night and in the mornings. I never had a lot anyway, but now I think (I hope) it's gone for good.  I'm tired BUT I will blame that on school, not being pregnant.  Having clinicals at 4:45 in the morning til 3pm is not conducive to feeling rested. :-/  But this morning during lab I got to learn how to do IVs!!  That was super cool and I felt very accomplished doing it and not passing out.  Although I did feel a little lightheaded when a fellow student simply practiced putting a turnequet on me. I'm such a baby.

Haha, not quite here yet! constipation, exhaustion, and nausea are about all I can relate to so far :-) lol

Exercise: I have STUNK at working out the last two weeks!!  I did something weird to my was killing me so bad I could barely walk on it.  So I've been wearing an ACE brace and trying to stay off it.  Praise God it's better now, so  I'm thinking this afternoon warrants a much-needed run :-)

How Big is Baby? Apparently, the size of a navel orange!! Crazy that thing is in me and I don't feel it yet!  He or she is about 4 inches long.  I'm dying to start feeling movement, but it may be a few more weeks since this is my first :-) Baby C is sure hiding well in there! The other day David was listening with the stethescope (we know we can't hear anything but we sure like to try lol), and I poked my stomach hard, and he was like, "I just heard something swish by!!"  Aw well.  Sure am lookin' forward to our 20 week ultrasound!

 Speaking of my man, you know what he did for me?  You know what he did??!!

 He installed wheels on the bottom of the laundry basket so I don't have to lug it around against my stomach any more.  Now I just pull it to the laundry mat! My awesome guy, gee wiz.........

 I love this man so much!! He's going to be such an awesome dad!!  :-)  6 months together a week ago!!!!  Gosh I love being married.  David is THE biggest blessing God has ever given me.  Followed very closely by our baby blessing.  Love you babe!

 And now I am off to clean my house and make homemade cinnamon rolls!!!  Cause my hubby has been working since 4am and won't be home til 7:30 tonight.  So he deserves a little somethin-somethin.  :-)